About the Wattmeister

Known as the Wattmeister, due to a fortuitous ‘win’ in a group Maximum Power test, when he out-performed his younger rivals, he is a founder member of the Muswell Hill Peloton. Today’s tasks include checking out the route of the 2014 Vuelta, while simultaneously tracking the latest activity feed on Strava, lest someone has stolen his KoM on the Sprint to Ridge sign.
The early stages of the Vuelta follow terrain familiar to him having ridden extensively in the Andalucian hinterland. His Strava time (age related, naturally) on the Puerto del Boyar, known locally as the Beast, would have been much better had he not generously sacrificed his good form by waiting for his pals, the esteemed veterans Plastic Pete and Iron Mike, into a raging February headwind.
Come to think of it, most of his rides seem to have been into a headwind, especially that epic breakaway in the 1992 edition of Paris-Roubaix in the company of Gilbert Duclos Lassalle and Olaf Ludwig. He tried to psyche them out by showing them that he was riding the fearsome cobbles of the Arenburg Trench in unpadded shorts, but they thought it was a cock and bull story. Mind you, he mused, those cobbles are overrated, the stretch of road from Coopers Green Lane to Potters Bar in Hertfordshire would shake out most riders’ fillings.
But back in 1992, he never made it to the Roubaix velodrome after bonking badly with 5 kms to go and failing to resist the temptation of a roadside friterie. If chips had not been invented, he would have been contesting the sprint finish.
His mind wanders, that’s what the thought of wind can do to a man. In 2013, la Vuelta was won by a 41 year old rider, Chris Horner, only fourteen years younger than the young at heart Wattmeister. There was still hope, but not much time, and actually, not much hope.
In 1985, the formidable Scottish climber Robert Millar was robbed of overall victory in la Vuelta on the penultimate stage by a powerful coalition of Spanish riders. The same fate had nearly befallen the Wattmeister last Sunday on the sprint from Potters Bar to Barnet speed camera, when the Quiet Assassin and the Lion King ganged up on him. However, the youngsters were thwarted when he produced 1105 watts for two seconds to deny them the victory.
He is proud of the fact that he always rides clean, his biological passport is available for all to see, although, he was out on the lash on Thursday night, which could present some anomalies. Even 55 year old amateur athletes are subject to the WADA testers, especially when they are continually producing personal bests.

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