Reminiscing on Past Victories (it’s a Rainy Day)

In a long (drawn-out) career, The Wattmeister amassed a few wins here and there, but one of his favourite efforts was at Cleethorpes in Stage 3 of the 1981 Soya Milk Race. Finding himself in a 3 man break with Johnny Depp lookalike Gintautas Umaras and Simona Krupeck (formerly known as Simon), on the penultimate circuit of the town centre, The Wattmeister feigned weakness by repeatedly spraying inaccurate snot rockets down his right shoulder.

At the press conference afterwards, The Lithuanian pair stated that they were so disgusted by the ineptitude of The Wattmeister’s technique that they dared not attack on his right hand side lest they get covered in bogey. Naturally, TW was aware of this, and hogged the left hand side of the run-in leading out the sprint from the front and into a stiff headwind, (his speciality).

In 1998, TW scored a particularly sweet success over The Wattmeisterin on the Altnaharra to Crask Inn hill climb in the Highlands of Scotland. Kitted out with touring bike and young child on a trailerbike, (as part of his training for the Veterans’ National Hill Climb championship), The Wattmeister stormed up the slope to record a pre-Strava fastest time in the trailer bike category.

It was only later that the delights of this win were diluted when it transpired that his 6 year old son put out 364 watts for 7 minutes while TW only managed a measly 191 watts for 2 minutes. It seems that Wattmeisterling 2 propelled the whole rig up the mountain on his own.




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