Cycling Transfer News

Team Southeast: Sprinter Alessandro Pettachi ‘AleJet’ has retired…..again.

Team SKY: Sir Bradley Wiggins has also retired and Richie Porte has joined Team BMC.

The Wattmeister is not foolish enough to think that Sir Dave Brailsford will be inviting him to fill their shoes, despite an impressive solo breakaway in the Tour of Trumpton circa 1977.

No, after submitting his comprehensive CV to the local JobCentre, talks are proceeding regarding a position with SudoCremeAllStars. They are looking for a qualified technician who can apply the product, sprint a bit (speed unimportant), break away at the drop of a hat, and buy the coffees after racing….all on the minimum wage.

The main sticking point in negotiations seems to be some misgivings regarding Public holidays for Half-Jews on behalf of the team’s Directeur Sportif, Rustie Nipl, who refuses to budge.

At the time of writing, The Wattmeister is still without a pro contract for 2016, but his stock has risen considerably after posting a personal best lap time of 6 minutes 18 seconds for Regents Park (without shortcuts) in the company of Muswell Hill Peloton.

On Friday, SavilleRow, Pistol and TW depart for Paris and the trio will be participating in the 1230 kms Paris-Brest-Paris Randonnée which for them commences at 19:30 on Sunday evening.

There could be a sprint finish.

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One Response to Cycling Transfer News

  1. Faustino says:

    Good luck with PBP. I am sure you’ll win that sprint!

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