Hopelessly addicted to rillettes, The Wattmeister sailed from Newhaven to Dieppe in order to stock up on the delicacy. The Captain of the ferry, the Cote d’ Albatre, claimed to have participated in the French version of Mastermind, choosing as his specialist subject, “The Career of Le Wattmeister”.
Flattered almost to the point of giving the captain a signed Paris-Brest-Paris jersey from 2003, (the elasticated waist has perished, not stretched as others have suggested), The Wattmeister’s elation turned swiftly to bitter disappointment when the captain admitted that his favourite comedian/sprinter in the Muswell Hill Peloton was in fact Slayer, followed by Killer Kay.
Arriving at the delightful port of Dieppe, Le Wattmeister was bullied by La Wattmeisterin into visiting the local Decathlon superstore. It is one of her many vices. After several kilometres of meandering up and down the aisles form North to South and East to West, the ageing sprinter’s young wife carefully replaced all the ‘sale’ items she had placed in her basket and decided to go with a new puffa jacket which looked spiffing but cost more than a new pair of deep section wheels.
Whilst enjoying a recuperative grand café noir and une pression at La Taverne de Musee in Fecamp, the waiter insisted that Le Wattmeister had been in the break with Jacky Durand and Guido Bontempi on stage 8 of the 1985 Tour de France….(it was actually 1983).
Returning to the wonderful campsite de Reneville, all the way mobbed by autograph hunters, Le Wattmeister popped into the Carrefour Express where he discovered Rillettes de Porc at 2 euros 77 cents….a comprehensive appraisal to follow in the coming days.
to be continued….wifi allowing