Hunting with The Wattmutt

After watching last night’s episode of The Hunt, a beautifully filmed BBC TV series documenting the extraordinary techniques used by predators to capture their prey, The Wattmeister was keen to record the Wattmutt’s modus operandi in tracking squirrels.

In stark contrast to the stealth of a tiger or leopard, The Wattmutt routinely chooses to announce her presence with a succession of high pitched yelps sending the squirrels scurrying for the highest branches in the tallest trees.

On occasion, (after watching The Hunt), she stands motionless for minutes at a time observing her prey before inching furtively closer in the style of a true huntress, before exuberance gets the better of her and the excited yelping warns the squirrels of her imminent arrival.

What has any of this got to do with cycling? Well, dog walking is an integral part of the older sprinter’s fat burning recovery regime. And The Wattmutt’s exuberance mirrors The Wattmeister’s effervescence on Saturday mornings in Regent Park.

Brimming with watts, overflowing with power, The Wattmeister is often guilty of announcing his intentions, like an excited puppy, to the assembled rouleurs, DingleDave, Wolf, LionKing and KrispyKreme, who then gang up on him in order to thwart his chance for sprint victory.

Yes, there are many similarities between the Wattmutt’s loud tactics with the squirrels and The Wattmeister’s overzealous pursuit of his rivals in Regents Park. Perhaps David Attenborough could be persuaded to film it.

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