The Wattmeister is the most placid of baroudeurs. Today for example, while he was stationary at a pelican crossing in Muswell Hill Broadway,(possibly the most dangerous place in the universe to be a cyclist), a car reversed into the rear wheel of his trusty steel framed bike. In order not to be completely flattened by the Vauxhall Insignia, he gently rapped on the boot so that the driver might cease the manoeuvre.
“What the fuck did you do that for?” shouted the fuming driver.
“I wanted to alert you to the fact that you were backing into me. I didn’t want you to run me over,” replied TW.
“You are always squeezing through those tiny little gaps !” continued the enraged automobiliste (unaware of the tautology, but TW let it pass).
“I don’t believe we have had the pleasure of meeting before, ” asserted TW.
“What are you fucking talking about you fucking ponce?” shouted the puce faced charmer
” There’s no need to be humourous my learned friend, I’m not looking for an argument, just an apology from you for reversing into me in front of all these witnesses……..before I call the constabulary.”
“Oh…..all right then, I’m sorry, but you shouldn’t have been there.”