Mythical Beasts

The Wattmeister is fascinated by the possibility that the Loch Ness Monster, Sasquatch, Bigfoot and Yeti thrive in the hidden and undiscovered  folds of this wonderful planet.

Solid photographic evidence provided by someone as credible as one of Muswell Hill Peloton’s recent Paris-Roubaix sportive finishers, The Gray Goliath, would confirm the existence of these mythical beasts.

Talking of which, there are not too many action photographs of The Wattmeister in the public domain.

“Why is that?”, you (both) ask in unison.

The answer to this modern day conundrum is quite simple. It has nothing to do with camouflage, reticence, agoraphobia, claustrophobia, rhinotillexomania or even extinction.

The real reason is that at speed, (which is always the case), it is IMPOSSIBLE for photographic equipment to capture images of the elusive Wattmeister. This is due primarily to the wattage forcefield interfering with the camera’s internal workings…a bit like a vindaloo…shaken not stirred. (The name’s Band….Gastric Band).

Finally however, the genius Gray Goliath has worked out a method of capturing The Wattmeister’s ectoplasm in a used bidon,  and reconstructing it into a tasteful figure of athletic prowess…(The Wattmeisterin’s words).

Regents Park Nalini - Copy

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