After an hiatus of nearly three years, The Wattmeister is on the point of embarking on a new career path with his brand…The Impersonal Trainer.
Over the years, as a permanent and inconspicuously aerodynamic fixture on the gym’s wattbike, he has been in a position to observe and listen to the interaction between various private clients and their knowledgeable and well qualified Personal Trainers. Without exception, the PTs’ collective expertise is routinely wasted as the clients invent ever more ingenious ways ways to avoid working hard during the session by initiating conversations on the most banal subjects.
This is such an abuse of the experts’ skillset. In order to achieve a widely recognised and internationally accredited level as a Personal Trainer, the applicant incurs a hefty financial cost and must pass several written and practical examinations.
In contrast, the highest level of Impersonal Trainer sanctioned by The Wattmeister Inc. is readily achieved at low cost and with surprisingly little effort.
If you are interested, then ask yourself these four questions:
- Can I count from 1 to 15 in the right order? (The number of repetitions for each set of exercises).
- Do I look good in lycra? (Natch!)
- Can I attach a heart rate monitor? (Just wearing one of these gets you really fit).
- Do I know what an ‘Arnold’ is?
If the answer to all these questions is YES, MAYBE or DON’T KNOW, then you are 3/4 of the way to being a certified WATTMEISTER IMPERSONAL TRAINER.
We have now reached the point where 99.9% of candidates will fail this rigorous test.
Answer this question honestly.
- Do I care?
If the answer is YES, then sorry, you will have failed to become an Impersonal Trainer, but you might do well as the President of the United States.